Andrew Mate, our incoming fourth year student together with three other classmates were on their way home last May 17, 2006 from an UPCAT review when the Honda civic car that was driven by his classmate hit a bulldozer along the Katipunan Flyover in Quezon City. One who was seated at the back of the driver's seat came out with minor bruises, the three others suffered head injuries and have to undergo surgical operation. The four of them were initally brought to the Quirino Memorial Hospital but later on the three were transferred to St. Lukes and Pasig Medical Center. Andrew's injuries were severe that the doctors did not allow him to be moved out.One was discharged from the hospital the following day, the other two underwent brain surgery and have to recover from the hospital for more than a month in the hospitals. He was actually seated at the back but he insisted to be seated in front to the point that they even have "bato-bato pik" who get's to seat beside the driver.
The traumatic thing for some of us teachers was that during the time that we visited Andrew at the hospital last May 19, we thought that he was already out of danger, however when we arrived the doctors were giving him CPR while his father and his younger sister watched helplessly. After 30 minutes of futile attempt to revived him, he expired. He had a broken brain stem, the degree of damage was rated from 1 to 12. In order for a person to have a greater chance to survive, he must have at least 6. Andrew's degree of damage was 3. I never imagined in my entire life that I would ever see a 16 year old boy dieing before my very eyes.
Yesterday was the 40th day of Andrew's death and it so happened that it was also his 17th birthday. It was an extra ordinary day for all of us. Our fourth year students who were batch mates of Andrew were all there including all his teachers, family and friends. We offered a mass for Andrew. During the homily, our school director told the boys that this is a hard lesson to learn for teenagers. I guess kids today think that they are like the superheroes in the current computer game craze called Dota. After a hero dies, he comes back again and continue fighting his enemies. That lesson should also go to parents. Please dont give the keys to your car if your son is underage. Loving them doesn't mean giving them all the material possession that you could posssibly give.
But the best lesson was about to unfold. The tense moment of all was when Andrew's mother came face to face with the three other survivors. The three of them stood up and in front of everybody apologized to Mr. and Mrs. Mate. They too have suffered a lot, two of them spent a month in the hospital and their parents have accumulated hospital bills amounting to more than P500,000 each. They never knew that their friend died not until the day that they were released from the hospital.
Will Mrs. Mate who was in the U.S. when it happened would get mad at the boys? Will she hate them? Well, that was not the case, she hug each one of them. Everybody in the room were tiery eyed. All the fourth year boys became so quiet. Well actually not quite, I could hear a lot of them sobbing. It was a gesture that have sent shivers to everyone, especially to these boys whom Andrew have considered as his barkadas. Mrs. Mate said "Andrew have loved you guys when he was alive and there is no reason for me to be angry. No one wants this to happen" I know the guilt feelings in them have all sudddenly been removed. Mr. and Mrs Mate are members of Couples for Christ and their only son and only daughter are active members of Youth for Christ. With their strong faith in God, they have found the strength to forgive.
Tintin, Andrew's 16 year old younger sister, a third year high school student at the School of the Holy Spirit became the darling of the crowd. She was calm and very confident when she related how her Kuya was her idol. She followed every dance steps his brother knows, the way he plays the guitar, among others. They both shared their dreams together. They plan to buy a house beside one another where they plan to have their own families someday and their own children playing together. They plan to share their "ulam" and can immediately borrow money from one another But now she will have to carry on with their dreams by herself.
It was not all a sad day as Tintin made everybody laugh when she shared a story. When Andrew had a Sophomores night in school she was her date cuz Andrew was too shy to invite other girls. She cancelled all her gimmicks that night just to be with his brother and then when she arrived she was frustrated to find out that many of the boys dont have dates. Our assistant principal even noticed that instead of bringing dates they brought hamsters and trading cards instead.
It's Andrew's 17th birthday. Everybody sang!!! and of course the family blew the candles on the cake.
One remarkable person that I have to mention here was Andrew's fourth year guidance counselor, Shella Fabregas, she went an extra mile to help the family. And during the program she even dressed up in a Claret school uniform, because Andrew wore his school uniform when he was cremated. I guess that's how we love this school so much.
She also came up with a presentation and I'm still trying to figure out how I can upload a 150 mb powerpoint presentation for free without cutting it into pieces. Help anyone?
For those who don't know Andrew. He is a young man full of life and vigor, an active member Youth For Christ, a very religious person, he could have been another one of our alumni Bo Sanchez, praising God and spreading the Good News. Aside from that he is a good dancer and most of all a friend to everybody. As his mother shared to us. Andrew doesn't mind if you are rich or poor, bad or good, a genious or not. Here's a short glympse of his life and death and I hope we can find meaning to his death. Although he had lived a short life, he became an inspiration to his classmates and an ideal son.
Here's a nice story that might help explain death to young people.
WATERBUGS AND DRAGONFLIES
(A Parable of Death As A Transition To A Better Afterlife)
by Doris Stickney
Pilgrim Press, 1982 New York
Down below the surface of a quiet pond lived a little colony of water bugs. They were a happy colony, living far away from the sun. For many months they were very busy, scurrying over the soft muc on the bottom of the pond. They did notice that every once in a while one of their colony seemed to lose interest in going about with its friends. Clinging to the stem of a pond lily, it gradually moved out of sight and was seen no more.
"Look!" said one of the water bugs to another. "One of our colony is climbing up the lily stalk. Where do you suppose she is going?" Up, up, up it went slowly. Even as they watched, the water bug disappeared from sight. Its friends waited and waited but it didn't return. "That's funny!" said one water bug to another. "Wasn't she happy here?" asked a second water bug. "Where do you suppose she went?" wondered a third. No one had the answer. They were greatly puzzled.
Finally one of the water bugs, a leader in the colony, gathered its friends together. "I have an idea. The next one of us who climbs up the lily stalk must promise to come back and tell us where he or she went and why." "We promise," they said solemnly.
One spring day, not long after, the very water bug who had suggested the plan found himself climbing up the lily stalk. Up, up, up, he went. Before he knew what was happening, he had broken through the surface of the water, and fallen onto the broad, green pad above.
When he awoke, he looked about with surprise. He couldn't believe what he saw. A startling change had come to his old body. His movement revealed four silver wings and a long tail. Even as he struggled, he felt an impulse to move his wings. The warmth of the sun soon dried the moisture from the new body. He moved his wings again and suddenly found himself up above the water. He had become a dragonfly.
Swooping and dipping in great curves, he flew through the air. He felt exhilarated in the new atmosphere. By and by, the new dragonfly lighted happily on a lily pad to rest. Then it was that he chanced to look below to the bottom of the pond. Why, he was right above his old friends, the water bugs! There they were, scurrying about, just as he had been doing some time before. Then the dragonfly remembered the promise: "The next one of us who climbs up the lily stalk will come back and tell where he or she went and why."
Without thinking, the dragonfly darted down. Suddenly he hit the surface of the water and bounced away. Now that he was a dragonfly, he could no longer go into the water. "I can't return!" he said in dismay. "At least I tried, but I can't keep my promise. Even if I could go back, not one of the water bugs would know me in my new body. I guess I'll just have to wait until they become dragonflies, too. Then they'll understand what happened to me, and where I went."
And the dragonfly winged off happily into its wonderful world of sun and air!
